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Not Alone with You: A Guide to Breaking Free from Toxic Relationships and Building Self-Esteem
Feeling stuck in toxic relationships or struggling with low self-esteem? This self-help book is here to help. Written by Marina Gogueva, it offers practical advice and real-life examples to show you how to build stronger, healthier relationships and boost your confidence. You'll get a supportive and non-judgmental space to explore your feelings and develop the skills you need to take control of your life. Whether you're dealing with a toxic partner, family member, or friend, this guide will walk you through the process of breaking free and building self-esteem. With its relatable examples and actionable tips, you'll be empowered to make positive changes and start living the life you deserve.
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Laughing at My Own Obsession: Why We Keep Falling for Toxic Relationships
summarizeEditor's Summary
I recently devoured a hilarious book about toxic relationships, and it left me wondering why these pitfalls are so eternal. The author's quick wit and self-deprecation had me chuckling, but the book's real strength lies in its ability to make you think. The writing is engaging, and the stories are relatable – even if they're not always pleasant to read. I've been reading it on my LitRes subscription, and it's been a real eye-opener. One line that really resonated with me was 'you've done it again!' – especially when I thought about my past relationships and childhood. That's when I knew this book was going to be interesting. It's a book that'll make you laugh and cry, but most importantly, it'll make you think about your own relationships and childhood in a new light.
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Kararİyi
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Orjinallik9/10
Etkileyicilik7/10
I recently devoured a hilarious book about toxic relationships, and it left me wondering why these pitfalls are so eternal.
I've been reading it on my LitRes subscription, and it's been a real eye-opener.
The book starts strong from the first pages, and the author is quick to poke fun at themselves and their own experiences:
One line that really resonated with me was 'you've done it again!' - especially when I thought about my past relationships and childhood. That's when I knew this book was going to be interesting.
The book is full of references to public figures' interviews and movie analyses, like 'The Naked Truth' which gets mentioned a few times.
The author shares stories from their clients and quotes their letters - it's like reading your own thoughts and feeling like you're not alone.
Let's face it, there are plenty of stories where a guy shows off by giving flowers to his friends, but it's not always about the woman. Sometimes it's just a way to get attention and admiration. Narcissists often do this. If you don't react with the expected level of gratitude, he might quickly turn on you and start insulting you, saying things like 'I went to all this trouble for you, and you're just clueless and ugly. Who else has ever given you something like this? You're worthless, and I wasted my time on you...'
The shift from a gift to cold hatred and insults is so sudden and intense that it's actually scary.
Many victims of these types of admirers post photos of the flowers and lavish praise on social media to try to appease them.
Women who've experienced domestic abuse often have a ton of photos in their social media feeds with huge bouquets and expensive jewelry... and they often post these photos right after a public argument (for their friends' benefit) to try to lift their mood, because abusers will ruin holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries.
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The author warns that relationships where you're not being yourself from the start are doomed to suffer and crumble. Either the mask will crack and you'll get tired of pretending, or you'll realize you fell in love with the mask, not the real person, because it's more convenient, and you never actually saw the real person.
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There's a common pattern where women are willing to go back to men who abuse them, just to see the show of them being vulnerable, crying, and giving flowers.
Once a year, it's flowers, but the rest of the time, it's bruises and insults. What kind of math is that? Women will do just about anything to feel special.
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It's wild how we think we can control someone else's behavior, but the truth is, we can only change ourselves. I've caught myself thinking that if I just tweak a few things, the other person will magically change too. It's like that old kid's logic: 'If I get a 5 on my test, Mom and Dad will stop fighting.' Newsflash: they're fighting over the mortgage.
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There's this harsh reality check when you stop trying to control the situation and just focus on yourself. It's like sanding down an illusion.
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I've noticed that women often complain to their friends just to get emotional support, but they're not actually willing to change. They'll keep playing the victim and expecting their partner to change instead of taking responsibility themselves.
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There are over 50 secondary benefits to this kind of behavior. It's a long list.
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Pride is especially hard to overcome. 'I'm doing just fine!' Rescue missions can be a real thing, but sometimes you've got to face reality. I mean, trying to revive a dead horse is like doing CPR, but at the end of the day, it's just not going to happen. You've got to accept that the horse is gone, and you're left walking.
I've seen people try to salvage a broken relationship, even when it's clear that it's beyond repair. It's like they're holding onto the hope that things will magically fix themselves, but the truth is, sometimes you've just got to cut your losses and move on.
Men can be pretty skilled manipulators, even if they don't have a clue what they're doing. It's like they have a natural talent for it!
Another tactic I've seen is when people take the blame for everything, just to avoid making any changes. It's like they're saying, 'Hey, it's all my fault, so let's just leave things as they are!'
The author makes a compelling point when they say that low self-esteem is a major contributor to relationship problems. It's all about feeling like you deserve to be happy, to be loved, and to be taken care of.
If someone's a drunk, why would you want to bring them home and deal with their crap for another year? Just move on!
But no, we've got to prove it, right? I was literally laughing out loud, sometimes to the point of tears, while reading these pages from the book.
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I've been there too - you put in all the effort, and your partner just lounges on the couch, expecting everything to be perfect. But what if you swapped them for someone who actually cares? It's like a breath of fresh air!
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The thing is, most of the time, it's not about being perfect. It's about having a partner who can handle the tough conversations, who can listen to your problems and work through them with you. That's what I've learned from this book.
It's full of real-life examples and insights, written in a way that's both funny and relatable. I was completely absorbed in the book, and I found myself reading it with a lot of attention because it's just that good.
This book is a game-changer for anyone who's ever been in a toxic relationship or is struggling to find their place in the world.
live_helpFeatured FAQ
What makes this book so unique?
The author's humor and self-deprecation make the book stand out, but it's the real-life stories and relatable themes that really make it shine.
Is this book suitable for everyone?
While the book is well-written and engaging, some of the stories and themes may be triggering or uncomfortable for some readers. Proceed with caution.
What can I expect from the book's writing style?
The writing is engaging and easy to follow, with a conversational tone that makes you feel like you're reading a friend's diary.
Will I learn anything from this book?
While the book doesn't offer easy solutions or answers, it will make you think about your own relationships and childhood in a new light.
Is this book worth reading?
Absolutely – if you're interested in the topic of toxic relationships, this book is a must-read.
Can I find this book on any platforms?
Yes, you can find this book on LitRes and other online platforms.
How long does it take to read this book?
The book is a bit long, but it's worth the read if you're interested in the topic.
Is this book suitable for a book club?
Yes, this book would be perfect for a book club discussion – it's thought-provoking and engaging.
check_circlePros
- •The author's humor is spot on, and I found myself laughing out loud at times.
- •The book is full of real-life stories that are both entertaining and thought-provoking.
- •The writing is engaging and easy to follow.
- •I loved how the author poked fun at themselves and their own experiences.
- •The book made me think about my own relationships and childhood in a new light.
- •The stories are relatable, even if they're not always pleasant to read.
cancelCons
- •Some of the stories are a bit too close to home, which can be uncomfortable.
- •The book doesn't offer any easy solutions or answers – which can be frustrating.
- •I wish there were more concrete takeaways or advice for dealing with toxic relationships.
- •The book can be a bit repetitive at times, but that's also what makes it relatable.
- •I didn't always agree with the author's opinions or perspectives.
- •The book is a bit long, but it's worth the read if you're interested in the topic.
